Elegy to a Dog
Junior was a great dog. Words can’t really describe how grateful I am to have shared part of my journey with him. Dog owners will understand. Those who have not shared life with a dog or are uncomfortable with them, may not appreciate the connection between a person and an animal.
I’ve struggled with my feelings for Junior and could not carry them around for long. My long practiced solution is to write them down, or in this case, express them more visually.
Life does move on, even if not always with the people and animals we love.
Christopher Bason says
I feel for you…as I look fondly on my own old girl…and think…
Regards Chris
Steve Williams says
Thanks Chris. Give your dog a pat for me.
Jim Zeiser says
I’ve had to put two down in the last three years and each time I was heartbroken. My Black Lab was just the sweetest dog you could imagine and a tumor took her. My Male Yorkie went from diabetes and I was holding him as he breathed his last. Both were loyal and loving friends and even though she drives me crazy this last little girl will be sorely missed when she has to cross the Rainbow Bridge.
Steve Williams says
I’m sorry to learn of your losses Jim. Dogs lead such bright, burning lives and then they’re gone. They remind me of the circle of life of which we’re all a part.
Kathy says
It hurts worse to lose a dog than most “friends.” My sage advice is to not go without a canine companion too long. I did that once and slipped into a horrible depression without even noticing. We are thinking of you, he was wonderful.
Steve Williams says
It’s strange how different my feelings are in regard to losing a dog versus a “friend.” Perhaps it’s because the relationship with a dog is more akin to that of a child. At least for a pet that lives with you day in and day out. I suppose some would think there’s something wrong with that. All I know is how I feel. Yet the feelings will pass and I need to make good choices as each day passes.
Another dog? Makes sense to me.
Fred says
Steve,
It has been a while since I posted anything to you, but I follow all your posts regularly. The incredible video you posted for Junior took me three times to watch in its entirety. Had to have some tissues and nose blowing breaks. I didn’t make it past the first minute without having to take a pause as the photo of what I assume were Junior’s final minutes was a near replica of our Mojo’s last times. He was a black Lab, lying on his bed covered with his favorite blanket. Then my thoughts went to the good and true Monte, the Dalmatian who refused to let me lie on the floor when I decided having a heart attack was a good idea. He prodded me with his nose until I was able to get up, stumble outside and collapsed on the porch and had neighbors who called the rescue squad and..
I digress, sort of.
You, sir, are a good dude and I think you bring a lot of thought provoking insights to matters far beyond telling tales of riding.
Thank you sincerely.
Based on your comments, I pursued a KLM. Which is not an easy thing to do here in Nebraska. Found one though, but I found it too tall for me.
Keep ’em flyin’. Within reason. Or not. Life is better that way.
Steve Williams says
Thank you for the kind words about the video. It was difficult to know where to draw the line regarding pictures. The final image of Junior was made the day before he died. I didn’t want to share those images because they seem more private, more troubling than the others. But he was tired and was ready to go in that picture. I laid on the floor with him and he would open his eyes periodically to make sure I was still there. He couldn’t hear anymore and he always wanted to make sure where I was. I would hold his paw so he could rest easier.
Like your dog who wouldn’t let you lay on the floor, Junior was sensitive as well. Often waking me when he sensed something wrong in the house or my wife was having trouble after surgery.
Regarding KLMs… some of them seem mountainous! Very tall bikes.
Thanks for sharing your experiences with dogs and I hope you find some fine rides ahead!
pitchertaker says
The feeling we have for a dog are not constant, but a dog’s feelings for us are. We load a bit of gulit for that difference. I still miss every dog I’ve lived with over the years, even get their names mixed up. RIP Junior
Steve Williams says
I miss all my dogs. I still feel sad at times thinking of some I had when I was six years old.
Junior was a constant. His feelings toward Kim and I never wavered.
Rusty Yeiser says
Steve, I think you’ll remember the eldest of my two PSU daughters, Emily, PSU CAS ’07. She’s about to lose her 10 year old golden retriever “Nittany” to liver cancer. She, and we, are heartbroken at the prospect of losing our “great dog” … a wonderful granddog with whom we’ve shared great walks, holidays and other visits, and our bed.
Words from a dear friend and former pastor helped when Emily lost one of her very favorite dairy cows are now a bit of a salve as we think about our lives without Nittany:
“But, as you know, with love there is much more. You have dearly loved this marvelous creature, and surely you have been loved by her. Each of you taught the other some things about love that so many creatures and people do not have the opportunity to learn. That is a wonderful gift, and it is one that lives way beyond any of our lives. The special memories you have will dry your tears, and even more, they will bring you joy and peace.”
And so we empathize with you on the loss of Junior.
Rusty Yeiser
Steve Williams says
I’m sorry to hear about Emily’s dog. It’s hard to watch a dog suffer. I’m grateful I could ease the situation for Junior. I hope Emily is able to find clear moments to make decisions about her dog.
Thank you for sharing the words from your former pastor. Learning from others, particularly animals, is a gift that cannot be valued. And the exchange of love means there will be pain at some point for one or the other. Clearly it is something that will live on after the relationship ends. Those special memories are powerful.
Best wishes to Emily and your family during this difficult situation.
Robert says
Remember the good times you shared. Take comfort in the good life you gave him, shared with him.
Steve Williams says
Thank you for the reminder Robert. Junior had a good life. I’m grateful to have shared it with him.
Karl Stumpf says
Steve, sorry to hear about Junior. My son and daughter-in-law in VA had 3 dogs: Guiness, Stella and Foster. A couple years ago Guiness died and was laid to rest. They sure did miss that special dog also. I am happy that they have fond memories! I’m sure you do also.
Steve Williams says
Thank you Karl. I have come to respect the power of memories, especially when faced with loss. Junior has provided a wealth of them.
Dan Lukovic says
Very sorry to hear about your loss, Steve. Been there too many times, so I do understand how you feel. It just seems that older we get, the stronger and deeper bond we establish with our four legged best friends. Thus, the parting hurts more every time. But, that’s the price to pay for this wonderful experience of love. And that’s something I would never want to be without.
Best regards,
Dan
Steve Williams says
You’ve said it perfectly Dan. The pain is the price we pay. And like you, I don’t want to be without it.
Kitty says
I am so sorry for your loss Steve. R.I.P. Junior.
Steve Williams says
Thank you. He was a great dog. I can close my eyes and see him…
Richard Massey says
Steve,
My heartfelt sympathy for you, Kim and Lilly. As someone who has held several of our fur friends as they took their last breath, I know the hurt and loss that only a dog lover can experience.
It seems cruel that they live such a short time compared to our lives when in fact, our lives seem short as well. I try to rationalize the good lives we give them, the good times they give us and the memories we have when they pass on, but there is always an empty space.
You video said it well, Steve. Well done.
Richard in Blue Ridge
Steve Williams says
Thank you Richard.
That empty space — I think that’s the hardest part. I keep looking up from my chair and expect to see him watching me.
mikeberrena says
Peace be with you and Kim.
Steve Williams says
Thanks Mike. It’s been too long. Let’s get together sometime soon.
Pat Besanson says
We’ve had three golden retrievers over 35 years and are now also dogless. The passing of these loyal friends never gets easier. My favorite “dogism” – I aspire to be the person that my dog thinks I am!
Steve Williams says
That’s a fine dogism. I hope I was the person that Junior thought I was…
Clyde Osterhout says
Whoever said “Times heals all wounds” obviously never had to say goodbye to a beloved dog. Years later the pain is still very real.
Steve Williams says
Yeah, you’re right Clyde.
David Masse says
I understand the loss Steve.
We had to put our beloved Golden Retriever Taylor down. Our hearts were broken.
I lost my uncle on March 28. I couldn’t bring myself to read this post until now.
We didn’t get another dog. We sometimes think about it. But so far, not.
I enjoyed meeting Junior. You were blessed with Junior’s company.
All my best Steve.
David
Steve Williams says
I’m sorry for the loss of your uncle and your Golden Retriever David. We all respond in our own way to loss and it’s not an easy path forward sometimes.
Junior’s departure has left a void in the house. Kim and I are ok but Lily isn’t dealing well with it.
I’m glad you got to meet Junior. He was a blessing.
Kofla Olivieri says
I am sorry to read about losing your dog.
Steve Williams says
Thanks. The sad reality of dogs and life.
Floyd Jasinski says
Steve-
My heartfelt condolences for your profound loss. I’ve been through it just two years ago, having to “help” our 15 year old cockatoo “cross over the rainbow bridge,” as they say… gut wrenching, and still saddens my wife and me to this day. When they say, “man’s best friend,” they sure got that right. That doggie, without skipping a beat, showed me unconditional love no matter what kind of foul mood I was in. Some say to get another dog right away, and that may work for them. But for my wife and me, we decided to put off bringing another pet into our lives right now for couple of reasons; 1) newfound freedom of truly being empty nesters, and 2) we can’t imagine going through that loss again in 10 to 15 more years.
Celebrate the memories,
Floyd
Floyd Jasinski says
Errata: cockapoo, not cockatoo. Darn autocorrect.
Steve Williams says
I assumed so!
Steve Williams says
Saying goodbye to a dog, helping them cross over the bridge, is definitely gut-wrenching. It will take time to replace those moments with something brighter.
I think you and I were both blessed with that best friend who always showed us unconditional love. Kim and I started considering another dog after about a week even though before Junior was gone we swore never again. The pain is sharp. Having a dog still with us we saw the affect on her and us. And two dogs aren’t anymore difficult than one.
So we’ve made some decisions…