How does illness influence your thinking in the middle of the night?
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Medical Choices
Standing before a stack of pre-heart attack cold medications in the bathroom I realize how much has changed in the past eighteen months. Not so long ago I would down any number of cold remedies without hesitation to relieve any symptom I had in mind.
After some consultation with Doctor Google I settle on two Tylenol and a big glass of water.
I feel like crap. The common cold on top of a sore back within the landscape of post-heart attack and ankylosing spondylitis life.
It’s funny the thoughts that come into your head when you wake at 3:12 a.m. after six hours of sleep.
“F*ck I feel bad.”
“My head hurts.”
“Better text Paul that I won’t be riding to Saint’s.”
“I need chicken soup.”
I rode into town this morning on the Vespa to run a few errands. A few hours earlier I had planned to ride 120 miles for lunch. The spirit is willing but the flesh is sick. Even the ride into town was too much.
I walked laps around the house with a bowl of chicken soup, dogs trailing behind wondering what this middle of the night activity meant. I didn’t tell them it was purely to limber my back and allow gravity to drain my sinuses.
After fifteen minutes I’m feeling a lot better. Not well, but improved enough to embrace delusion and denial.
CC0 public domain image from Pixabay.com
I Want to Go For a Ride
It started with me thinking about riding in the morning to Saint’s Cafe despite feeling light-headed, sneezing and coughing.
“It’s not that far.”
“The fresh air would be good for me.”
A lap around the house later I’m thinking about going for a ride now. In the middle of the night. Kim, who’s awake now and reading a book, breaks the spell by asking if I’m going to take off work today because she thinks this is Monday morning.
I don’t mention the riding idea.
A dog is nosing me. He’s suggesting it’s time to go back to bed. Don’t have the heart to tell him I’m going to have a cup of tea and a cookie…
Hope you’ll be feeling better soon. It’s seriously time for a break from sickness, heart and back problems, and colds of course. The scoot is waiting!!!
My suggestion: Your body is telling you to lay low for a couple of days. A cold weather ride would help your mind but not likely the body. You’ll be scooting in no time!
I’ve been laying low long enough now that I’m getting better. May attempt a short ride in the morning even though the thermometer will be at the freezing mark. I’ll see how I feel when I open my eyes…
One the mend. Feeling much better. And I agree that all the health stuff is getting old. I may be up for a short ride tomorrow morning.
It’s tough when negatives accumulated make a stack too high to see over. On the boat, I envision a powered anchor winch (which cannot happen), or a miraculous weather prognostication to see me through a night such as you had.
But, soon, we find ourselves in the wind once again . . .
Those tall stacks get depressing. I’m glad mine have tumbled over and I can see again.
Feel better quickly.
When I am sick I spend way too much time thinking about medications I can or can’t take because of the possible effects on ulcerative colitis. I am pretty good about not being up to ride because of neck, back, or generally being sick. It doesn’t mean the urge isn’t still there & that a good bit of time wont be spent thinking about riding.
I am a lot better. Finally.
I was sick enough this time that I really didn’t think or care about riding much. I knew I was too far gone. Spents a lot of time sleeping. Maybe that’s what I needed.
A long time friend sold me his iPad Air, he purchased one of the new smaller MAC laptops. like me has the big iMac computer (x2 in my case) so replying one key at a time. I do own a Mac Book Pro as well,the iPad is so much lighter in weight.
As to your predicament at 03:00 in the wee small hours. You probably needed a pee, your head and your aging (there, it has been noted)body is complaining (again) and you have run out of easy solutions!
You can’t/are not allowed what you want, conflicts with other prescribed meds.
So now you think. Tea with Paul would be good!
Mind over matter eh?
Been there, the shirt does not fit, trust you went riding anyway, bundled up against the damp and the cold.
Spread the illness to your workmates on the morrow (a year from now you can only give a cold to Kim), carry on McDuff!
You too shall survive this, with or without our help!
P.s. Writing a reply with this iPad seemingly takes forever! Anybody else on list have similar problems?
Get a Lot Logitech keyboard case/cover for your iPad Air. I had one and used it for years and it was about the same as typing on a laptop though it’s about 10% smaller than a regular keyboard.
I have the smallest MacBook Air made. Tiny, light and more that adequate to do everything I need. I do have an iMac at home for processing images in Lightroom, sending files to my printer, and editing video. But I love the Air…
Mind over matter… for the first time I can remember, I’ve listened to my body and took at easy. Didn’t rush off doing what I wanted. I’m pretty good at making bad decisions about riding despite how careful I tend to be on the road. Sort of like me thinking I was going to ride the Vespa to the ER the night I had the heart attack…
My colleagues at work didn’t see me for nine days. Slept most of that time. I’m grown up now and it’s the right thing to do.
I have a wireless keepboard that I use sometimes to write digitally but don’t want to drag the laptop along. It connects to the iPhone and I can pound out text in a Google doc with ease. And since I don’t often read or look at the screen while typing it’s almost perfect. Looks weird, but very light. Maybe you need a keyboard with your iPad.
Took your advice! I use an independent Apple dealer which also has a superb repair facility (they do the repairs for three different traditional Apple stores).
Traded the iPad on an Early 2015 11″ MacBook Air; purchased a clear plastic shell case and the extended warranty. Spent about C$1100.00 keeping in mind this particular unit is now a year old in terms of production date, no matter.
Like you find it far preferable to an iPad.
The much heavier MacBook Pro is on my upstairs office desk; the two iMacs and their calibrated screens live in my basement photograph editing area.
And never shall they meet; I don’t use iCloud.
I’ll likely purchase a MacBook Air when I retire. I have the 11 inch now but it’s no longer available. I’ll have to look at the 13 inch version.
I have an iCloud account but use DropBox more. I like having access to things where ever I am…
I’ve found that riding with a cold to be a real pain especially if congested. And the cold air doesn’t help much. I’d make up a batch of home-made chicken soup and call it a day…
Chicken soup really helps. Didn’t have the energy to make homemade. So I lived on Wolfgang Puck’s Organic Free range chicken soup…
All that conflict in the mind can stir things from the shadow. I like that you type into your blog/journal and go on a midnight scooter ride. That shows to me that you still have some clarity and presence left. But I can say from my own experience that in a situation like you describe, where the s___t is coming in from all directions, that that can unleash the demon. So do what you are doing (keep it real) and it will all pass. I promise.
Just so you know Paul — I thought about the midnight ride but didn’t take it. Stayed in bed. If I have any clarity at all it revolved around the knowledge that I was feeling really sick.
Things have passed and I’m feeling better. If it holds through the night I’ll see you at Saint’s in the morning.
Sorry that you have not been feeling well lately. Some colds are hard to shake. When I feel that a cold is coming on I try to nip it in the bud. I take Alka-selzer Plus tablets, vitamin C tablets and lots of OJ and extra sleep. That combination seems to help.
Take good care of yourself and I will say a prayer for you this evening.
Karl
Thank you for the prayer Karl. I appreciate it.
Like you, I try to nip the cold in the bud but I’ve not had much luck with that during the past couple years. Rest works best but I resist until I drop. Go figure.
Sorry to hear about your current aches and pains….a cold on top of back pain….hopefully it won’t last too much longer.
Almost back to normal. Almost. Whatever normal is…
A vaporizer can do wonders. If none is available then a heavy, constant dose of orange juice will help to flush it out. I have a c-pap machine and when this hits I use the vapor function heavily. The cold usually disappears in a couple of days. Fluids are the arch enemy of colds.
In lieu of a vaporizer I spent a lot of time standing over the bathroom sink applying steaming hot compresses over my nose and face allowing the heat to ease the pain in my face and the steam from the cloth to enter my sinuses. Amazing how good that feels…
I drink a lot of water but it didn’t seem to do much this time. And what used to take a couple days to clear now lasts a lot longer…
I too am now a member of your illness group. Started three days ago November28), so simply shut down; cancelled a surgeon’s appointment for a procedure for next March.
Told his secretary what I had and her words of advice, “stay inside, drink plenty of fluids and rest.” That was three days ago, still feeling weak however and starting to function; figure it will take a few days to completely return to what may be considered normal…
Trust your illness has slowed.
Sorry to hear of the onset of your illness. Hope it fades quickly.
I’m much better. Cold did build into a bad sinus infection requiring antibiotics and steroids but I feel way better. Drinking lots of water. Resting. And no riding. Until tomorrow. Maybe…
Hope your feeling better now.
Yes sir — much better!