“You have pneumonia”.
It’s not what I expected to hear during a second visit to a doctor in a week. The first was a feverish trek to an urgent care center on a Sunday evening when a cold or flu turned towards infection. Being on an immune system crushing drug for ankylosing spondylitits you learn to pay attention to persistent fever lest you’re body enter a competition with a bacterial interloper that it’s just not prepared to fight. A horse pill of levofloxacin is the antibiotic ringer in my corner.
Several days later the fever was gone along with all other symptoms save a nasty, choking cough. A visit to get a cough syrup prescription grew larger with a diagnosis of pneumonia. The persistent state of feeling old, tired, exhausted started to make sense.
Into my sixth decade I’ve become keenly aware that my body has changed but it’s subtle, a little less strength, a little less endurance, a little less desire. But add a serious cold to the picture and suddenly I’m imagining life at a more advanced age. It left me asking questions about what I’m doing with my days, what I want to do, and what I need to do.
I’ve not been on the Vespa in weeks until this evening — a short ride to test what I’m able to do and how quickly energy seeps away. For the past year I’ve been thinking about growing older and this latest illness just turned up the heat. I keep thinking I’ve entered a levofloxacin dream.
The Vespa still feels familiar. The evening air was cool and I could feel it flow over the place in my chest that can flame into a ragged cough. Riding with the visor down and making sure to keep any physical exertion to a minimum there were no problems.
Still, I got tired quickly just from pushing the scooter onto the centerstand and taking a few pictures.
The short ride this evening was a simple, physical test. Still not ready for a long ride but will probably be able to commute to work. Despite fatigue, it was a thrill to see the sun fading beyond Mt. Nittany. There are many mountains I want to see by Vespa before I can’t.
Thinking about health and growing old may chew away at plans and ideas — dreams really that fuel a lot of creative activity. I’m reminded of something novelist Gabriel Garcia Marquez said about growing old:
“It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.”
Illness put a temporary blindfold over my dreams. Best take the blindfold off…
Wishing you a speedy recovery. Try to take it easy, and enjoy the little things. I have been out on my Vespa for the first time after recovering from surgery. It was neither a fast nor a long ride, but it felt good to be back in two wheels.
Thanks Sonja. I guess little steps is the order of the day…
Hope you feel better soon. I’m also going to suggest a hot Toddy. You drink enough tea and whisky and you won’t care if your sick. Just don’t go riding while drinking the cure.
Sounds like a Mad Men cure.
I hope you get well soon. On your point getting old, I know a gentleman here in Canada who kept riding his Harley well into his seventies without any issues, so in relative terms you are still young!
Another good quote referring to age and agin get:
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
Mark Twain
Hi, Steve,
Congratulations on getting on two wheels again. Great feeling, heh? And what a great time of the year!
Take care of that pneumonia…it’s nothing to be fooled with, as you know.
Good to hear from you again.
Karl U
More and more I have an eye open for people riding into “old age” (whatever that means). I can’t seem to resist the urge to measure out my riding time. Pointless actually since it could end tomorrow or go on for twenty more years.
Good quote from Twain.
Hope that you are feeling much better. Shake the dust off, summer is on its way!
Hello Lori,
For some reason it takes longer and longer to shake the dust off. But I trust it will come off. Hoping to make a trip your way on the scooter sometime this summer. I’ll let you know if I do.
Hope all is well with you, Tony and family.
Now I know why you weren’t at Ken’s last gathering. GWS (get well soon) and I hope to see you at the next P&P.
BTW, I get my gallbladder removed in 3 days, further delaying my cross country trip. Yeah, I’m aging out too.
Not sure this posted before: Now I know why you weren’t at Ken’s last gathering. Get well soon, and I hope to see you at the next one.
BTW, I get my gallbladder out in 3 days, further delaying my cross country trip. Yeah, I’m aging out too.
I just didn’t have the energy to come to the gathering. Slowly improving and hopefully will be at the next Moto Hang.
Good luck with your surgery!
Like they say Steve: Old Age is not for the Weak….
Glad to read you’re feeling better….the last few days of camping in Moab, reminded me of the onset of old age….sleeping on a foam pad(s), waking to find rain IN the tent after having failed to remember to install the rain cover on said tent….bones creaking as one crawls in and out of the tent…..
Looking forward to decades more of your scootering adventures.
Sleeping on the ground is a much rougher activity now than it was when I was younger. Add wet ground and it can be just miserable. Still, I have dreams of some scooter camping this summer — creaky bones or not.
I’m looking forward to decades more of scooter adventures too.
Geez, Steve, you’ve had a hell of a week or two. It’s gotta be a good sign, though, that you’re feeling able to ride to work (the child that’s well enough to play is well enough to be in school).
I am suspicious of that Marquez quote: It is ear-pleasing; it is bittersweet; I’m curious at what age he wrote it. I am neither old nor young, but his words sound like those of a younger man (free of aches and pains and illnesses) poeticizing old age.
I’m definitely ready to try and go back to work but a few hours of activity wipes me out.
Poeticizing, or romanticizing old age seems unlikely in our culture. I figured Marquez was imagining (as a younger man) what might cause an older one to give up, an attempt to explain what eventually happens to all of us, and implying some blame on the old.
I can say as an aging man I ask myself those questions, especially when I feel a sudden and pronounced loss of physical power. Nothing like it to get you questioning the future.
Hi, Steve,
Congratulations on getting back on two wheels…and at a great time of the year!
Too bad about the pneumonia diagnosis, but it sounds as if it’s under control.
I’m less than a month away from 79 years old…I’m certainly aware that my end of time on scooters is approaching faster than liked, but it does make me enjoy a ride even more. The only regret I have is that I didn’t take it up sooner in my life!
Take care, Steve…in spite of the bad news, it’s good to read from you again.
Karl U
Karl U,
I look forward to your comments and the support I take from them. Still riding a scooter near 79 is a shining beacon in my day. My father-in-law is not far behind you but I know he is getting close to stopping.
Pneumonia seems to be heading the right direction though it is surprising how fast I lose energy. Hopefully that will change soon.
Yeah, gettin’ old ain’t for sissies.
All the best for a complete recovery.
The good thing about getting old is ready or not here it comes.
I wish you luck and I hope you find it in you to make that trip over the horizon and fulfill those long held dreams. By the time I cannot ride a sidecar or my elderly Vespa thanks to the infirmities of old age I trust I shall be ready to retire to a contemplative life with no regrets. “:Je m’en fous du passé.” Words Edit Piaf sang, and I have tried to live by them, but it is a struggle. Key West is a good place for old foges to ride.
It’s slow going Conch. I thought I was over the hump and them boom, not feeling so well again.
I’ll have to figure out what Edith Piaf is saying and will let you know if it works for me. Thanks for stopping by and reminding me of Key West.
Get better soon mate, as it gets warmer over there it gets colder over here, cheers from Bendigo Australia
Working at it. Stay warm down under!
Courage Steve , we are all with you!
Thanks!
Pneumonia, the old person’s friend. Friend you ask? Yes, Pneumonia is usually the trigger to a permanent passing. Hitting sixty years of age is not the problem rather what it does to you, mentally and with this illness it lays you you lower than a snake’s belly.
And it takes seemingly forever to recover to what you think is normal.
In your future Steve, may well be retirement at some point from daily employment and then too, a grandchild in the offing, and then there’s Lilly the Belgian sheepdong pup (with absolutely wonderfully docked ears). So much to to an enjoy. Does jUnior realize Lilly is there for him as much as you and your wife?
Life throws us curves we neverexpect, in my own case can well understand the pitfalls of health care and what it does to you the patient.
I tell people do what you can do now, regardless because later on you may not be able to do which you want as financial and health reasons come first. I would love to travel to foreign lands, not going to happen due to the cost for travel health insurnace, for me due to my numerous maladies. Best quote was C$234.00 premium, per day…go figure.
I have the money, it is the actual dollar cost that scares me. And then finding air transport where thee is enough legroom, hip room and a place for my four-wheel walker.
I’m beginning to appreciate the idea of being laid low by pneumonia. Was pushing things a bit but my body is tapping me on my shoulder –“Not so fast fella…”.
I can see how it could change how I think about myself and my capacity for things physically and mentally. It kind of redefines weakness. I’ve always wondered why some people seem old. I have my eye on this.
Haven’t been able to see my granddaughter since she was born because I’ve been sick.
But see a lot of the new puppy. Junior definitely sees a new partner in crime with Lily. I imagine it will only improve as she gets bigger.
Deciding on retirement and doing things when you can is a challenge many face I guess. It spins in my head from time to time but right now I’m just focused on the day ahead…
A couple of years ago, a cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatment was a huge wet blanket, not just on life in general but on my riding season. Even when treatment was behind me, I was tired and weak. Afraid to ride, because while I was pretty sure I was well enough to get where I wanted to go, I wasn’t certain I had the energy to make it home. Nothing like sickness to make you think about the inevitable tick tock of the clock. That, and my grey hair.
Hope you’re feeling better.
Hope things are going well for you Dave. You’re right about illness raising awareness of the inevitable tick tock of the clock. I suppose it can’t be any other way. I have to believe awareness is a good thing but at times it feels scary…
Hi Steve,
Sad to hear your not on top form pal, Hope you get back to normal soon.
When you start talking about what you want to do while you can leads me thinking towards Bob…..Fair play to him he was a do it guy, We should all be like Bob except the sandals:)
They suited him but not me!
Take care Steve .
Regards
Len
You never know when infectious disease will pay a visit. The doctor guided me well and am now on the mend it seems. Bob did do things when he could and his story is never far from thought.
And I agree with you on the sandals!
Since you’re kinda laid up, maybe now you can finally work on those world domination plans you’d put on the back-burner?
::sharpen pencil, get out moleskine::
I’m sorry you aren’t feeling so hot, Steve. I hope you’re up to flittering hither and thither soon.
I thought I would get more time with the Moleskine but my brain was having no part of writing or thinking about world domination plans. Feeling better now and the doctor says in time I’ll feel my normal old again!