What Do I Remember?
A blogging challenge has me thinking about a special memory from 2016.
Sorting and categorizing memories is tricky business. What’s special one day if forgotten the next. The scary, awful stuff seems to forever float near the surface of consciousness while the fun stuff takes work to recall. This in part fuels both my journaling and photography — an action focused on building and retaining memory.
The rides have started to blur together making it difficult to choose one single ride as special. There’s a subtle pressure to narrow a choice to family and loved ones as if there is a hierarchy of importance when it comes to memory. I’ve accepted there’s no accounting for what my mind chooses to remember. When I ride the Vespa scooter the world slips away leaving an open expanse to think and recall memories. At least when I’m not thinking of the future.
The future — that has something to do with the most special memory of 2016.
It’s a memory about something that won’t happen for another 148 days — retirement. Or more precisely, the special memory is a recollection of the jumbled thoughts and feelings related to my decision to accept a buyout offer for early retirement. As early as nearly 44 years of employment can be.
The days leading up to to the deadline to accept or reject the retirement buyout offer were painted with dreams of adventure and stained with anxious misgiving of letting go of something that has been a steady beat my entire adult life. I reflected on those concerns in a post titled Retirement: A New Adventure.
While many exciting and delightful things have happened in 2016, those days in September stand out as unique, strange, and special.