Scooter in the Sticks

Exploring life on a Vespa, Royal Enfield Himalayan, Honda Trail 125, and a Kawasaki W650

Riding in the Zombie Apocalypse

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BMW K75 motorcycle on rural road
A BMW K75 motorcycle in the zombie apocalypse.

Reality in the Bright Sun

Can I outrun the advancing zombies on my motorcycle? Those words echo in the darker chasms of my mind, a river of fear flows through the abyss and I’ve slowly overcome by a fever of fear and anxiety. Far above there’s panic in the world. And the only treatment, or at least the one I reach for first is to go for a ride.

Riding imparts a quiet solitidue in my head. It can wash away the darkness and leave me standing in the sunlight, upright, calm and with a renewed perspective on the day. Or at least that’s my hope as I push the BMW K75 out of the garage.

I’m attracted to stories containing threads of melancholy and loss; especially in literature and movies. Irresistible forces and frightening odds with a protaginest who emerges beaten and bruises, heavy with grief yet triumphant as a representative of all that’s good with humanity. It’s never been clear to me why I’m attracted to these stories. I’m neither a hero in life or in the fantasies that drift through dream and consciousness.

It’s early morning with dazzling sunlight, welcomed after so many days of a monotone grayness that whispers to crawl into bed and go to sleep. The motorcycle moves smoothly along the highway as I head south along the front ridge of the Appalachian Mountains. It’s colder than I thought it would be, a few degrees below freezing, and my feet producing a dull ache as they give way to the cold. Another stop, this time for fuel and some time indoors to allow my body to warm.

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Anatomy of a Vespa Rider

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Illustration of Andy Heckathorne
Heckadude Morning Coffee. By Andy Heckathorne.

Thoughts and Musings with Andy Heckathorne

Andy Heckathorne’s recent winter riding photographs on Instagram sparked the idea of interviewing him. Those images, along with the portrait with the coffee mug above visually encapsulate his easy and thoughtful manner. This is my first interview in 15 years of posting on Scooter in the Sticks. When I saw those scenes of his Vespa GTS300 scooter on those snow-covered roads I just had to know a little more about what made him tick.

Andy is an art director at Penn State, where he and a team of designers manage the branding and advertising needs for more than 50 revenue-generating auxiliary and business units. These include Housing and Food Services, The Nittany Lion Inn, and the Bryce Jordan Center.

After hours, Andy also runs his own illustration and design business. His artwork’s been featured on everything from albums, billboards, and beer trucks, to sports uniforms and on the American Eagle Building in Times Square.

Andy lives with his wife and three teenaged sons in Bellefonte, Pennsylvania, a lovely Victorian town about 12 miles from Penn State. His favorite outdoor activities include hiking, kayaking, playing softball, exercising the family dog, and of course, riding his Vespa scooter.

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Portrait of a Portrait

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Andy Heckathorne holding up print of a portrait of Steve Williams
From one scooterist to another.

Andy Heckathorne, husband, father, artist, scooter rider.

My friend, artist and fellow Vespa scooter rider, Andy Heckathorne, surprised me with a portrait of me with my scooter. Aside from a stick figure I got for $10 from a scam artist at the Reading Terminal Market in Philadelphia, this is the first non-photographic representation of me I’ve ever seen.

It feels exactly right.

From the camera around my neck, the cross-armed pose, the details of the scooter, to the snowy landscape of the forest, it’s a perfect portrayal of the relationship I have with riding a Vespa. Andy even got the graying hair right.

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Scooter Porn and Other Tales

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Vespa scooter porn picture at sunrise
Scooter porn or documentary evidence of a cold morning ride. Perhaps both.

Scooter Porn at Sunrise

A strong beam of sunlight sweeps across the landscape. The Vespa is paused along the road, engine running, heated grips growing warmer in the sub-freezing chill. Frost crunches underfoot as I walk across a pasture searching for the right composition for another portrait of my Vespa GTS scooter. Pulling off leather gloves to use the camera puts bare flesh to the cold metal body of my Canon G15 camera. Hands chill quickly until the composition and exposure are right and I make a photograph that feels like that morning on the road.

Scooter porn. I’ve become what my mother pleaded with me not to do when I told her when I dropped out of college that I was going to be a photographer — someone who shoots porn. And now it seems I’ve become a producer and purveyor of scooter porn.

I’d decided the previous evening that I was going for a ride in the morning because the weather forecast promised a high of 40 degrees. A fine day for a winter ride. But just a few miles from home I was already wondering when the bright sunshine would drive away the sub-freezing air.

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Ramblings of a Riding Eccentric

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Vespa GTS scooter on rural road under a dramatic sky
A fine way to start a day — on a Vespa scooter under a dramatic sky.

Behold the Morning

There’s something thrilling to be on the road with the Vespa on a cold, crisp morning under a dramatic sky. Scanning the horizon the world seems strange, different than the one I normally inhabit. My old hearten quickens and I feel a crackle of energy through my body. For a moment I feel on fire, right there, right now. And that feeling follows me throughout the day.

Sitting here now, looking at this photograph of my Vespa GTS scooter, the memories of that morning feel melodramatic. Almost like a dream. And if it were not for the fact that I’ve experienced that same feeling dozens and dozens of times I might dismiss it as the odd ramblings of a riding eccentric.

Perhaps that’s what I am.

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