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Joys and Losses

September 30, 2018 by Scooter in the Sticks 14 Comments

Reminders of Days Long Past

The sad news of the death of Marty Balin, a founder of Jefferson Airplane, transported me to being a teenager in college, connecting to a new world of ideas and people to a soundtrack of Today by the Airplane.  That song is haunting to me and conjures emotions and experiences both pleasant and painful.

It plays in my head and stirs memories of a few years of a carefree existence with little responsibility.  Perhaps it will have a similar effect now and work some magic as I wander the backside of life.

A box of black and white photographs

Three Prints Project Revived

By the time I got to college I was seriously involved in photography though it had not yet registered as a career possibility.  Many evenings and weekends were spent in the darkroom, mesmerized by the magic of chemistry and light.  

Fast forward 45 years and I’m still in the darkroom processing film and making prints.  After a several year hiatus I’ve begun working with the view camera again on a personal project.  The short term goal is to produce new work each week with the eventual production of small folios or books.  Still working that part out.

Dumpster in alley
View of Humes Alley in State College, Pennsylvania.

Wandering

I realized I used to wander in college much like I do today.  I remember prowling the streets and alleys of State College with my first view camera back in 1972, a baby Century Graphic.  The only thing different today is the color of my hair.  

I wish.

Vespa scooter parked on street at night

Night in State College, Pennsylvania

Most of my riding of late has fallen into the utilitarian realm of chores and errands.  The Vespa scooter parked in one of the free motorcycle parking areas awaiting my return from some errand I don’t remember.

On most days I don’t realize I’ve walked these same streets for 45 years. But sometimes, especially at night, I’m back in college, and Today is playing in my head.  And I long for a simple time that felt warm, friendly and compassionate to the world.

Where did that all go?

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Filed Under: riding

Comments

  1. Mike says

    September 30, 2018 at 6:24 am

    A very poignant post Steve. It took me back to the same moments in time. I look in the mirror and wonder how I arrived in Autumn, and what happened to my Spring?

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      September 30, 2018 at 8:15 am

      Frightening isn’t it, looking in the mirror. I wish I was thinking about it 40 years ago…

      Reply
  2. Phil Leddy says

    September 30, 2018 at 7:54 am

    Marty Balin will be missed as he possessed an incredible voice. I can still see him on the stage at the old Boston Garden back in ‘76 swinging his hips, clapping his hands as he sang “Miracles”, truly mesmerizing that evening. RIP Marty

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      September 30, 2018 at 8:18 am

      His was a great voice from that era. He was one of my favorites along with Greg Lake. The first time I heard “Miracles” was in 1975. It was after midnight and I was sitting in a donut shop when it came on the radio.

      Reply
  3. Poppawheelie says

    September 30, 2018 at 10:14 am

    From my FB page: MARTY BALIN PASSES AWAY
    Marty Balin, co-founder of Jefferson Airplane and then Starship passed away at 76. Per NBC News: Balin was a galvanizing member of both the band and the San Francisco scene, and in 1965 helped launch a club in the city called The Matrix that hosted many groups of the era, ranging from the Airplane, the Doors and Janis Joplin to the Velvet Underground. Living in San Francisco sometime later, Lynne met Gracie Slick at a show of Gracie’s art.
    The Airplane issued several albums into the early 1970s, played both Woodstock (1969) and Altamont festivals.
    The group splintered in the early 1970s but several members, including Balin, Slick and Kantner, reunited as Jefferson Starship in the mid-’70s, and Balin’s high tenor voice became a centerpiece of the group’s sound via hits like “Miracles” and “With Your Love.”
    RIP

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      September 30, 2018 at 10:28 am

      Thanks for sharing the information Robert. I had forgotten about The Matrix. Different world back then.

      Reply
  4. Steve says

    September 30, 2018 at 11:50 am

    Steve, you and I are very close in age, and your thoughts are my thoughts. Yes, where did it all go?

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      September 30, 2018 at 2:46 pm

      Where did the time go indeed. I either wasted it, or am in denial of how much I’ve actually done. That assessment seems to vary depending on the day…

      Reply
  5. RichardM says

    September 30, 2018 at 3:46 pm

    I remember the song but not the artist. Jefferson Airplane was one of those groups that I heard on the radio but never looked for their albums. I think it was before my time…

    I occasionally think of earlier days but don’t dwell on it. I wouldn’t want to live those days again. Happy to be where I’m at today.

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      September 30, 2018 at 4:36 pm

      Generally I’m like you and have no desire to relive earlier days. But there are times I realize how bad my decisions, or indecision could be, and wonder how things might have been different if only…

      Reply
  6. BWB (amateriat) says

    October 1, 2018 at 11:52 pm

    I think most of us have a fair number of “if only” days, and, for those of us of a certain age (damnit, I want to form a scooter club called Scoot Riders of a Certain Age…raise your hand if you get the reference), the passing of someone like Ballin (or Prince, or…well, you know) brings those thoughts/regrets to the fore, if only for a fortnight. I’ve had mine, but in recent years they’ve come around with less frequency; I’d like to say that it’s because of a more acute sense of time’s passing, and how much I may or may not have remaining, but I can’t be certain. To quote another famous singer: regrets? I’ve had a few.

    Film, and view cameras: sounds good to me. Over here, the wife, after she has her last original joint replaced (early November) is planning to dust off her Rolleiflex and get back to working with it after a decade-plus strictly shooting digital; there’s a chance I’ve been an influence here, as I never entirely gave up film, merely cutting back for logistical reasons, although I’ll be ramping up things as I clear out and set up the basement for darkroom work, first for film processing, then for setting up her enlarger and related stuff. (I know what I’d like to set up down there, but it’ll be all I can do to get filtered running water going, as well as making/keeping things as dust-free as possible.) For myself, I want the ability to make small b/w prints to create folios of specific work in, although I’ll mostly still be scanning and digitally printing like I’ve done for the last 20 years.

    Good luck with the (sort-of) new photographic forays!

    Reply
    • Steve Williams says

      October 2, 2018 at 8:33 am

      *Raises hand*

      I’ve had a steady diet of being startled by people passing. Celebrities, old girlfriends, friends and relatives. It will only stop when I’m gone myself. But I’m not as haunted by it as I once was. I hope it’s not because I’m just getting used to it.

      The film shooting and processing procedures are feeling a bit clunky to me right now. More so in the darkroom where the process and timing are no longer second nature. Even the mixing of chemicals. Had to spend some time with my darkroom notebook trying to divine how I did things. Managed to process 8 sheets of TXP last night. Will make contacts and a few prints today.

      I plan to make small print folios as well. And I’m grateful I never dismantled the darkroom. It was there waiting for me last night. Just turned on the water, mixed the chemicals and floundered on…

      Reply
  7. Kitty says

    October 2, 2018 at 9:29 pm

    On a personal note, “Yesterday I was 18, and today I’m 65!”

    How’d that happen?!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Existential Angst - Scooter in the Sticks says:
    October 19, 2020 at 12:06 am

    […] see the struggle in my face. There’s less laughter and song. I’ve begun to look like I […]

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