Surprisingly, I have already stampeded a small flock of Dorset sheep. The rumble and roar of the Vespa is more than the wooly beasts can bear. I now kill the engine and coast by unsuspecting sheep, BMW riders and PENNDOT workers out of concern for their collective psyches.

I have an extensive library of swear words and apply them as an old master does oil to canvas. Several commanding tapestries of verbal cursing still circles the earth as slowly decaying sound waves.

Generally I try to avoid the stimuli that calls them into play. Your offer of counsel is deeply appreciated though.

I used to have more comprehensive wrenching skills but those were related to more primitive machinery — ’62 Ford Falcon, ’70 VW Beetle, ’63 Corvair Spyder. Things have changed since then. Need to update my skills and confidence.

I read the extensive details of this most recent blog posting with great interest. First of all, I think the windscreen should significantly increase your gas mileage, making it necessary to refuel the bike only one or twice a year.

Secondly, this should increase your maximum speed to 38 miles per hour, consigning the days when you had to pull over to avoid being trampled by stampeding sheep to history.

I was unaware you knew any swear words. Please contact me directly for advice on this matter. Or feel free to take one out of any line of my blog.

Fondest regards,
Jack/reep
Twisted Roads